"Hell, there are no rules here - we're trying to accomplish something." - Thomas A. Edison
"I have found that people who can successfully resist temptation invariably lead depressingly stunted lives." — C.D. Payne
"So don't weep for me now, my friends, because science insists that I have not died.
Energy just always changes state and I refuse to believe that human consciousness is the sole exception to this universal law."
- Mark Millar
"Do only butterflies die in flames? What about those devoured by the flames within them?" - E.M. Cioran

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Flick to Click: Welcome To Obamaville

Fuck!  It's not really a movie!  Those writers should jump Santorum's sinking ship and head out to Hollywood.  They need to meet Michael Bay.  ;-j

And if you're in the mood for more inflammatory rhetoric, this is kinda cool.  (click the photo)

Pretty Girl Update - Jennifer Love Hewitt

JLove has a new show called The Client List.  In it, she takes off most of her clothes a lot.

Just In From the Desert

I know I told you to wait until Thursday, but the Tribe made cuts today.  Lonnie Chisenhall and Matt LaPorta, both former #1 prospects in the system, will begin the year together at AAA Columbus.  Despite the aforementioned similarity, their situations could not be more different.  Chisenhall, only 23 and with exactly 292 AAA plate appearances under his belt, was rushed to the bigs last season in an effort to arouse a flaccid offense.  The Chiz Kid's future is still bright, especially after a bit more seasoning.  LaPorta, on the other hand, has struggled to a career Major League OPS of .701 and did nothing to take advantage of a spring opportunity to win the left field job.  Already 27, he has repeatedly shown the ability to bash AAA pitching (career .953 OPS), making it unlikely that anything he might do in the minors could help to recapture his good standing with the organization.  Oh, the team also reassigned outfielder Chad Huffman to the minor league camp.

Hot Corner:  In the first race to go officially official, Cap'n Jack is your Opening Day third bagger.  To celebrate, Hannahan took the day off.

#5:  Alright folks, here's the wrinkle.  I have incontrovertibly established that Manny Acta is an idiot and today GM Chris Antonetti stated that the top priority is to leave camp with "the best 25 men" even if that means that one of the 5th starter candidates is shuffled to the bullpen.  Acta has already laid the groundwork for this colossal blunder by complimenting Jeanmar Gomez's work "out of the bullpen" early in camp.  Regardless of anyone else tells you, putting Jeanmar in the 'pen as a long man and allowing either Kevin Slowey or David Huff to take the 5 slot would be beyond asinine.  JG won the spot, give it to him.

Left Of Center:  In the classic move of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory, Shelley Duncan took an 0-for-4 handle at the dish today to drop his spring average to .195.  Now I can't be as high on Duncan as I was just 5 days ago, but it truly seems as if he is winning this war of attrition.  Despite a 1-for-14 slump since mashing his 5th spring training bomb, Duncan has the confidence of Antonetti and, by means of cheap deduction, Acta.  Manny says that he has a candidate in mind and Shelley's production (5 HR, 15 RBI) has been the only noteworthy accomplishment by any of the candidates.

Somewhere Out There:  As we're speaking of the same players that were auditioning for the starting job in left, we're left with the same issue, that of being utterly and completely underwhelmed.  There are still five candidates on life support, so let's rank them 5 through 1.  (5) Ryan Spilborghs: 0-1 today, .167 AVG, .456 OPS on the spring.  'Nuff said.  (4) Fred Lewis: 0-1, .200, .635 in just 15 ABs.  The only reason he's not #5 is that Spilborghs is.  (3) Russ Canzler: BB, .297, .690.  I know that he's everybody's darling, but he has just one extra base hit all spring (a double) and he plays left like Luis Valbuena.  (2) Felix Pie: DNP, 231, .622.  This is the guy that I want.  He plays Gold Glove caliber defense and brings some speed and energy to the team.  But the Indians are committed to mediocrity.  (1) Aaron Cunningham: 0-1 today, .216, .486.  He's out of options.  They basically traded two top 50 prospects to get him.  He wins.

Bench Me:  Stop it, Andy LaRoche, you are not making this team.  I do not care that you have a better batting average than Jose Lopez (.391 vs .317) or that you have zero errors and he has 5.  It cannot, it will not, it must not happen!

Mightier Than the Sword:  I'm tired and I'm not going through all of the candidates right now.  I will tell you that Jeremy Accardo (1.29) threw another scoreless inning, fanning two.  How do you not give this guy a spot?  Also, Rick VandenHurk (12.38) got rocked... again.  In his inning, RVH walked Paul Konerko then served up a gopher ball to Brent Morel.  Let's see them rationalize it when they keep him...

At the Cubbies tomorrow @ the usual 4:05p.

P.s. The Indians are a Cactus League worst 6-15.

Pretty Girl 03.27.12 - Meaghan Rath

So, yeah, Being Human is only mildly entertaining, but it's wicked awesome when a show pimps out their mildly hot chick in a heavy make-up/bra & panties scene.  I'll say it again: panties.  Nice.  ;-j