You're Waiting For a Train...

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Pretty Girl 06.16.11 - Vanessa Hudgens

vanessa-hudgens-details-shoot by EgotasticMedia

It took about 3 years of everyone telling me and her people had to "de-ethnicize" her a bit, but, finally I get it. She's hot.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

A Quest Called Tribe

ETrain: "So, Fausto Carmona has already allowed three runs in the first inning. His stride is flying all over the place and he cannot throw strikes. On top of that Jack Hannahan made a stupid error. As someone who blogs about the team, how long am I required to watch this game before I give up?"

Jerry: "It's a minimum of six innings."

ETrain: "Six innings? That's ridiculous."

Jerry: "Well, I could give you a break if you weren't at opening day. Were you?"

ETrain: "Uh... Does it count if I don't remember it?"

Jerry: "As long as you're not wearing any Indians gear right now."

ETrain: "I really shouldn't wear my hat inside..."

Jerry: "Six innings! No matter how bad Fausto looks."

ETrain: "God damn it."

Ahh, the wisdom of Seinfeld. In the wake of the only two wins over the past 12 games coming by 1-0 scores, in the shadow of being 2-hit last night, under the weight of a 3-0 first inning deficit, the Indians played as we had seen play so often through April and May. They strung together hits. They did the little things. They kept everyone involved. And, hell yes, they won.

Orlando Cabrera had 3 hits and 2 RBI. He had produced 5 hits and one rib-eye all month coming in. Shin-Soo Choo reached base 3 times. He had not done so since May 22nd. He scored three runs. He had not done that all season. The game went so well that the official scorer took away Hannahan's error in the aftermath.

The bullpen mafia was out in full force. In his last two games Chris Perez has faced six hitters and struck out 5. Rafael Perez (1.32), Vinnie Pestano (1.52, nasty!) and Tony Sipp (2.22) put together three shutout innings to pick up the luckiest man on earth: Fausto Carmona. Carmona: 7 H, 2 BB. Mafia: 0 H, 2 BB. Fausto was "gutty" enough to earn the win tonight, but please realize that the man leads the league in earned runs allowed (59) and did little to help his cause this evening. Carmona (4-8, 5.79) actually saw his ERA rise from its pre-game level with the removal of the E-5 and he needed 103 pitches to make it through 5 frames and qualify for the win. Was it an improvement over his last 5 starts (0-5, 9.55)? Well, yes, but an invasion of CHUDs would have been as well. We shall see.

Cheers.

90 Seconds On El BJ

So, LeTrash thinks that he is better than all of us, that we have to let go of our hatred and return to the problems of our everyday lives. Even if we give the guy the benefit of the doubt and dismiss the possibility that he was rubbing our faces in the fact that he makes $50mil a year while we have to worry about what we order at Wendy's, LeBrat is still living in a fantasy. Could he honestly believe that fans (short for fanatics by the way) should be less impassioned about professional sports? The boy should be clamoring for more hate, more irate indignation. I get the impression that LeTard thinks that if all of the fans went away, if all of us suddenly recognized the frivolity of the NBA and focused more energy on the "real world," that he would still be flush with green. In that Sprite addled cerebral cortex, he believes that he would be a superstar gazillionaire if we did not have the need to see over-sized goons throw a rubber ball through a metal ring. Shut the fuck up, LeWaaaaaaah and try get some perspective on something that you have not spent 18 seconds living in, ever, the real world.

Why was this on my mind? On Cleveland.com, some idiot posted best wishes to Mike Brown with the Lakers. Now, I am in no mood to rehash the glaring absences of his tenure, the gargantuan gaps that any normal coach could fill, so I shall not speak of him as a coach, rather as a teacher. Given the most talented 18-year in basketball history, Mike Brown reared him, mostly by laissez-fair, into the scoundrel that he is today. Thanks to Brown's tutelage, Queen James is spoiled child, a ego-maniacal boor; he is a waste of time. Thus, I am done talking about him.

And Mike Brown, I hope you lose 27 in a row, you worthless piece of syphilitic shit.

Cheers.

Flick to Click: Bellflower

Opens 08.05.11

Pretty Girl 06.15.11 - Jennifer Lothrop

And to think, Dave Holmes must have hit this. Unbelievable.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Clip Joint Ready For Prime Time

Jason Knapp

Your Columbus Clippers have completed a four game sweep of the Buffalo Bisons and have won 8 in a row overall. The Clippers now sit at 44-22, the 4th best record in all of minor league baseball. Personally, I am in favor of just recalling the entire team and assuming that they can do better than 2 wins in 12 games.

Scottie Barnes picked up the victory and has shown, hold your breath, a great deal of consistency over his last seven starts. Over that streak, Barnes is 3-0 with a 2.17 ERA and 12.29 K/9. Nice. Tonight, he was removed after 5.1 as he had thrown 104 pitches. While only 58 were for strikes, he walked just two, while allowing a run on five hits and punching out 7. Scott has elevated himself into the big league mix. One would have to assume that he would be a better choice than David Huff, with only Zach McAllister and Jeanmar Gomez higher on the radar.

Jason Kipnis tripled twice and has become the hottest Clipper hitter since Luis Valbuena's hit streak came to an end. Kip is 11-for-22 in his his past five games with three triples, two homers and seven runs scored. Non-options Jerad Head and Chad Huffman added long balls of their own.

The Clips move on to Scranton ~~tomorrow~~ Thursday with McAllister again looking for his 8th victory in a 7:05p start.

Other Minor Points of Interest --

Jason Knapp, the most highly regarded talent acquired in the Cliff Lee trade, has been shut down for the season with soreness in his pitching shoulder. He had surgery today and will begin rehab in six weeks. This, in all likely hood, indicates that Knapp will not pitch until the fall's instructional league. Knapp's season ended even before it started as he never made it out of extended spring training in Arizona. Jason has thrown just 40 innings in the organization since being acquired in 2009, although he has fanned 59. He is still just 20 years old, but this is his second shoulder procedure. In the words of another pundit, "Be worried."

Travis Hafner had a successful beginning to his rehab assignment at Akron as he put up a 1-for-2 with a walk and a run scored. If you like to be optimistic, there is a possibility that Pronk could rejoin the big club for the weekend series with the Pirates.

Bryce Stowell, think Ricky Vaughn before he got the glasses, made his 2011 debut for Lake County tonight. Stowell, who progressed as far as AAA in 2010, was utterly unable to command his pitches in spring camp. He made one appearance on the big league side and walked a pair around a two run dinger. If Bryce has his head back on straight, he is a great talent (11.7 K/9 career) that could be in Cleveland by September (no pressure). Today, he threw two scoreless innings with a walk. Assuming consistency and command (big if), he should not be with the Captains for very long.

Aeros infielder Matt Lawson, the player that the Tribe acquired in the March trade for Aaron Laffey, has retired. Lawson, 25, had been dealt twice in the past year and was not receiving steady PT in Akron. Still, he was hitting .267 in 2011 and had produced a career .282. The best of luck to Matt, who I had the pleasure to meet once, on the rest of his endeavors.

Home town hero Anthony Gallas has been promoted to Kinston. In his first two games at the High-A level, Gallas cranked a pair of doubles and drove in three. Anthony had hit .314 with a .910 OPS for the Captains. Always the best to the undrafted free agent, who is truly living the dream.

Cheers.

A Quest Called Tribe

I will be the fist to admit that I have not posted extensively during the losing streak. Every day has dawned with the hope that the skid would come a halt and the minutia of the mess could be dissected in the bold light of winning. Still, day after day it has endured. On May 1st the Indians were 19-8, 4.5 games up. As late as May 23rd, the lead was 7. On June 1st, they were 33-20, a full five games on top and visions of playoffs danced in our heads. Even I chose to believe, tacking a +5 onto the wins that I expected from the Wahoos. Now, reality has come crashing down.

Over their last 26 ballgames (9-17) the Tribe has scored 77 runs. That is 2.96 runs per game, which is awful. Take into account that 45 of those 77 runs have been scored in just five of those contests and the RPG in the remainder drops to an inconceivable 1.52 over twenty-one games that the Indians have managed just five victories in. Since June 1 the team is 2-10 and has scored 20 runs (1.67 per) with seven of them coming in the near comeback during the first game in the Bronx. The Tribe has been shut out in five of their last 18 and has scored one run in four more of those.

Today, on the heels of posting six times as many strikeouts as hits, the Indians have fallen out of first place for the first time since April 7th. The team needs an infusion of offense, from anywhere. Cord Phelps (1-for-14) has not been the answer over his first 4 games. Something must be done. Unless some sort of trade can be executed, and soon, the only option is a wholesale call-up from Columbus. By wholesale, I mean Lonnie Chisenhall, Jason Kipnis, Jared Goedert, Ezequiel Carrera, Luis Valbuena and anyone else with a chance to knock the ball around. I am sure that there exist a myriad of arguments that can be made against this strategy, but, simply put, the kids could not possibly do any worse. As opposed to young pitchers, who might get shelled for ten runs without recording an out, the batsmen can only register a plain old 0-for-4. You cannot score fewer than zero runs. There. Is. No. Downside. To do nothing aside from sitting and waiting for the drought to end is sheer madness.

The impotence with the stick is not just the responsibility of the scrubs. Grady Sizemore is batting .200 with 1 homer and 26 K's in 60 at-bats since returning from the DL. Orlando Cabrera lost his everyday job because he is striking just .153 over his last 21 games. Matt LaPorta's average is .186 since May 20th. After seemingly getting his train on the tracks, Shin-Soo Choo has driven in just one run over his last 13 while knocking at .160. And on, and on, and on,

A good friend commented the other day that, although the inexperience of the club is now on full display, the season will likely result in a .500 record or slightly above. As fans, he suggested, we should be grateful both for this and for the two months that young'ns spent in first. I am inclined to agree with this assessment, but it does nothing to quell my anger in the moment. The dudes on the 25-man roster are playing like chicken fried shit. In fact, if we are no longer playing for today, then all the more reason to get the prospects on the lake front. I mentioned five recalls and there might not be room for all of them. Adam Everett, Austin Kearns and Chad Durbin, though, could be cut tonight without a single person, outside of their families, shedding a tear.

Enough of my mad lament, time to eat some crow. In the midst of this abomination, Carlos Carrasco has thrown very well. He has earned both of the team's victories since the first of June by throwing a combined 15.1 shutout innings, allowing eight hits and four walks, while fanning 13. I had called for quick trigger with Carlos prior to those two outings and, admittedly, he has risen to the challenge. It remains to be seen how much consistency the young man can establish in 2011, but he has earned enough of my respect that I will support him through the growing pains of his first full MLB season.

At least it cannot get any worse tomorrow.

Cheers.